Okay, so I have a few questions about poop that has baffled me throughout the years and I know you all think about it too.
- Why does it smell bad? Why can't it smell like chocolate? It looks like chocolate...
- Where do the different colors come from? For instance, my poop was yellow last night and the only thing I ate that was yellow was mac n' cheese.....
- Why can't we decide what color we want our poop? I think it'd be pretty cool to be able to say, "Ya know what, I've been feeling pretty down today, I think I'll go take a purple poop, that'll make me feel better."
- Since poop comes in many different shapes and sizes, couldn't we treat our anus like a cookie press? Just insert the piece that's shaped like a star, and voila! Star shaped poop. They do it with play dough is all I'm sayin....
- How can a semi-solid/liquid thing feel as sharp as a knife? The physics and logistics of it just don't add up. Is it all the tiny glass particles finally coming out of us because as kids we played around in the attic insulation too much?
- How is it that you can't remember the last time you ate corn, but somehow it magically appears in your poop? Is someone force feeding me while I'm asleep?
*Law & Order theme song playing in the background* Someone's gotta ask these important questions. For most of them, however, we may never know the answers....... chilling isn't it? You just got chills didn't you? If you did, that means you probably need to poop.
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